ARE AN ENIGMA
i dont think im very good at being a person . i will die once the responsibility of life really truly hits, or will i ? as long as someone remembers me and thinks of me, i will exist as an angel . incapable of independent thought just the same as them, locked in a god . ill be whatever they saw, until im either too warped to see me in the mirror or they simply forget and move on .
i do not think my body is alive sometimes . it doesnt feel real . like its just something im clumsily puppeting . some things i feel, in the tactile sense, i dont think are real . fear that theres bugs in my skin and burrowing in my bones, the feeling making me too scared to move at times . feeling like my heart is a bomb, going to explode at any moment . i dont like the delicacy of this thing . it leaves me scared of things that either arent threats, or arent even real . i do not like the blood flowing through my veins . if i think about it too long my heart starts racing and everything burns .