WELCOME 2 MY BEAUTIFUL BRAIN
[10:45PM] HI GUYS back bc i took medicine before and feel SO GREAT temporarily and i HAVE to go see my bestest friend in the WORLD tomorrow because SCHOOL starts soon and i need to SEE HIM so i have to PRETEND to be SUPER DUPER PERFECT HEALTH SO I CAN GO PRETTY PLEASE CAN I HANG OUT WITH ALASSTOR and that is a yes or yes question you see because I HAVE TO I HAVE TO I HAVE TO I HAVE TO . anyways . sorry
HALLOWEEN IS SOOOON HALLOWEN IS SO SOON THE SPIRIT HALLOWEENS R GONNA BE OPENING IM GONNA GET THE BEST DECOR AND SHIT TRICK OR TREATING WILL BE SO FUCKING FUN yes i still trick or treat i like a little whimsy ITS GONNA BE GRREEEEEEAT
[7:30PM] hey guys just popping in 2 say that i havent been active on here at all the pasy few days cause ive been majorly sick with the worlds most fucked up headache and screens have been my worstest enemy, im probably still not gonna b super active until im feeling better
while im here though, yesterday i went to do school orientation stuff !!!! because new school and AAA I START NEXT TUESDAAAAY LET ME GO BACK I DONT WANNA GO TO SCHOOL THIS BULLSHIT but . whatever . its fine . the school looks fine . real shitty though we arent allowed 2 have vpns on the school laptops ?? super obnoxious but w/e
anywayz BYYEE guys see you in a few if im not dead lol :3
[1:30AM] when i was little, like really tiny maybe 5-6 years old, i remember this really vivid thing that happened one night where i was in my room trying to sleep but i just couldnt . i was looking at the ceiling feeling weird and everything was so, so bright and colourful in this nearly completely dark room . i wish i could remember the specifics, but i really cant, all i can confidently remember was that i felt off (sick almost?) and everything being bright and almost starry ?? god i wish i could remember what i really saw . i think i got up a few times and bugged my parents about it, it faded but not fully with the lights on, turning them off immediately let me see them again . a similar thing happened a few years later (i was 8 i think) when i got sick, but it was more clearly in my head than truly seeing things in the room . i know that time i was definitely sick so it mightve been a fever dream, but i was definitely awake, at least half . weird stuff man
looking back on all that now i remember the first one happening a few times just to lesser degrees
[7:35PM] sometimes i get so so sad because living sucks ass and i just cant remember why im still here when everything sucks but then . occasionally . i will finally feel a little at peace, alone and happy, and i remember that im here because living can actually sometimes be so chill . theres a few times where if i could press a button to disappear, i would choose not to press it because i actually like living . and i just think thats nice, i wish it could be like that all the time :3
[9:00PM] AAAGRGRRVGRHVGSB its creature hours baybeee !!!! i need 2 eat lights and kill people
[12:50AM] i want 2 never do anything ever again . actually i dont think i can do anything ever again, my brain is so fried from just fucking . existing . which i know everyone hates i cant just exist !!! i have to DO things !! so i can work someday or something and be my own person with like . a life . i dont wanna do that ever ever ever i need 2 never do that i cant do that if i tried it wouldnt work . this isnt me being a pessimist this is me being confident in my own limits . maybe im disaabled, maybe im stupid and attention seeking, whatever the fuck is wrong with me i dont even want it to be fixed i dont wanna be *better* . i dont want to *have* to be better i guess . i dont even like existing to begin with its so hard and everything hurts and im just so tired forever bleegh
lol . lmao . that aside everythings ok i guess, had to do orientation stuff for my new school today and then have 2 do MORE of that on monday bc god personally said FUCK YOU !!!!! but whatever . i did some art stuff not too long ago i have to post once i get my phone bc im so lazy, and a super cool art thing i cant wait 2 show :3 not even my friends have seen it yet mwehehehe >:3
[10:45PM] im dead and my skin is rotten like moldy bread but im also incapable of actually dying ????? kinda fucked up ngl . sorry having a weird night and been a little off these past few, so less updates 2 the site :[ my dad and his gf made stew today though it was great !!! i stole onions and a tiny bit of raw garlic . second best my mouth has ever burned :3
[11:10PM] tehehe i love downloading music heartheartheart . download all your favorite songs reject music streaming apps and audio/video ads forever and EVER
anywayz i needneedNEEED the dorms in rh to come out RIGHT NOW and when they DO the prices better have dropped for the furniture because oh my god . ive seen some rich fucking players STRUGGLING and sobbing over lost diamonds just decorate like one corner of the dorms :skull: why does a hairbrush cost 20K thats so stupid ?? why ????? i dont get it smh
[6:35PM] hihihi good after of the noon losers i AAAAAAAAAA . im a little bored and dunno waht 2 do . cant play roblox cause i need my dad to update it i hate apple devices forever n ever . mayb ill actually work on one of my interest pages again
[11:30PM] AUTISM PONY
[11:20PM] augh been a few days hasnt it . oops !! time 2 tell people on the internet about my life again !!!
soo tha important stuff outta the way my dad and his girlfriend had an issue i think ?? so if u remember on the 11th we were talking abt ut/dr and the topic of The Transgenders (omg me heart) came up and my dad mentioned to her (when i wasnt there, so i dont know what his exact phrasing actually was) that he cant really relate/doesnt super
SO OTHER THAN THAT SILLY BULLSHIT !!!! WE MADE CHILLI YESTERDAY !!!! IT WAS SUPER FUN almost accidentally cut my hand cutting onions oops but it was GREAT and we're gonna DOUBLE the seasoning next time :3 i literally have not eaten any real food since i had the chilli and theres still more left i love life sometimez
ALSOOOO pretty much the reason i havent been on here THE NEW ROYALE HIGH SCHOOL IS OUT ON ROBLOX YEEEEA i kinda hate it just a little sorry i want everything unlocked NOW !!! its obnoxious not being able 2 complete more than half the quests because more than half the school is locked ,, plus that stupid wall door ugh i HATE i tried everu code i swear bleggh . had some fun tho, fucked around w the locker decor and made my locker + my oc halloween themed !!!!!!! bc what the fuck else would i, lee, king of halloween and all that is spooky do !?!?!??!
anywayz if u wanna bug me ingame my username is annoy1ng_child have fun (and tell me that ur there from my site or ill b freaked out heart) love u byebye !!!!
[6:05PM] AAAGRRVGAVGR i dont wanna socialize irl todaaaay but theres people coming overrr and i dont WANNAAAA AAAAAA theyre nice people too but im just bleegh i need 2 socialize TOMORROW and stuff so i dont wanna do that TONIGHT !!!! ill live ig broken heart
mayb i should work on something on here, i wanna put more stuff on the interest pagez
[9:15PM] ok ACTUALLY . the socializing was great honestly it was a fun time . we watched the emperors new groove bc i got 2 pick the movie !! that was fun, my second favorite movie next to coraline . after THAT we talked for a WHILE about ut/dr in which i talked about its great trans representation + how people are still assholes about chara/frisk/kris being canonically non-binary, and just how fucking GREAT the game is AAAAA
had a wonderful time actually it was nice :3
[11:10OM] AAAAA FUCK I AM BORING AND SHE IS GOING TO HATE ME FOREVER
[12:40AM] good morning inter net im feeling rather interesting 2night i miss everyone and also i need 2 run around in the woods for a few hours i cant do that tho idk where the nearest woods are + i am horribly out of shape but whatever it ok we stay silly we stay silly we stay silly we stay silly we stay silly we stay silly we stay silly i am going 2 explodes and die and die and AAAAA weee wahoooooo i love everything and everyone tooo much and its very mean
[9:40PM] there NEEDS 2 be more games centered around moths ,, the only decent ones ive found are Mothkeeper and ig flutter starlight but i need MORE man !!!! moremoreomre stuff abt moths 4ever n evr !!!!! its so sad 2 me that theres not enough cool media surrounding them
[10:20PM] so in my room i have a little loft area, its kinda cramped but its my favorite place in the world and i call it my cave buuut there been a bunch of ants up there so for the past like 2 weeks i have been able 2 hang out up there :[ i miss it up there so much, it was my little area !! beds comfy ig but the cave is just comfiER and i rlly rlly wanna hang out up there again
i think soon , like tmw soon, im gonna clean it up so i can go back up there and chill . the wathers been cooling off too so the tempature wont be too much of a problem anymore !!!!
[12:45AM] hello silly little things online im feeling sososo silly right now . i want to be a creature just such a thing in the woods stalking everybody thru the trees i want people to get spooked when they see me for the right reasons i want them to not know what i am and i GRGRGRGRGRGGRGRGRRGGRGRGR
today was great but also a little sad bc alasotr no libarby broken heart . but damien have me such cool bracelet love u damien yaay :D
rn im watching MBH play Employee of the Month, its a bit of a silly horror game and its got a lot of character, and bc mbh is soso cool the videos super long and (mostly?) uncut which is GREAT bc it makes amazing bg noise !!!!! i lovelovelove watching games like this its like they r made just for my stupid brain
im feeling so aaaaaa and creature rn but i just dont know how 2 accurately describe it with words and its frustrating me . grgrgrgr . i am just halloween in a human body i think i think thats me i dont know what am i what am i what am i what am i am i really me i dont know hihihihi !!!!!!!! oops i think im getting more n more comfortable talking here i might have some rambles sorry love you love you love you
i might do some longer blogs tmw cause im not doing anything as far as i know
[3:00PM] aaaaaa good afternnooooon im tired and sad today this is great heart emoji . i am saaad and stupid yippeeeeeeee
[3:15PM] watching manlybadasshero get all the endings in needy streamer overload probably isnt the greatest for my declining mental stability rn but honestly when have i ever cared ab that until its too late lmao
[3:10PM] hheyeeyehy gaymerz i am fucking EXHUASTeD today !!!!! did so much yesterday ,,, went with my dad and his cool giiirlyfrieeend ooo to a farm and there was LLAMAS n shit it was GREAT bro then we went to the BEACH and it was EXHUASTING !!! i found some severed crab claws in the sand too ,,, seagulls r cruel ,,,, and omg there was like a butterfly greenhouse at the fuckign farm and i wanted 2 go in SO bad but it was CLOSED by the time we got there AAAA but there were some butterflies outside of it too . we saw um . 2 monarch butterflies fucking . but they got mad we were interupting and one of them literally took off carrying the other ones limp body so THAT was fun to watch
overall a pretty good day i need 2 sleep for 5 yearz
[11:55] SO today was real fun !!!! went 2 a carnival thing and just so happened my girlfriend was ALSO going to that SAME CARNIVAL and neither of us no the other was gonna b there so that was SUPER fun look at use we were so cute heart
we got a very silly son named Harold too (we do not talk about the other Harold . im too lazy to get a picture of him)
neither of us rlly wanted to go on the rides so sucks for her sister lol but we just talked abt ocs for like . a while . hour ? mayb more ? idk but it was gr8
[7:15PM] augh hi guyz !!! sorry yesterday was kinda like really really funny and my brain was mean but im much more active this afternnoon !!!!! feeling super duper creature 2day so i might do a little entry in tha cryptozoology page if i feel up 2 it, or at least start an entry :3 got my teeth fixed a lil bit yesterday too that was great until it wasnt !! we were on the way home and i was just like . out of it . kinda stopped feeling like i was real it was a bit scary and not very fun feeling but im a little better now !!!! :3
[1:10AM] if i let myself go a little insane mayb i will feel a little better . like . if i just let my mind wander into something a liiittle bit i might feel a little okayer but idk if thats , ok . idk !! :3
i guess im sort of doing it rn but ive gotten too used to it and its not changing much ig ?? idek i need to feel something new and horrible or ill die i think
im scared when school starts again my brains gonna crack like an egg under the pressure so i might as well get started on that in preperation
[12:25PM] yesterday went great wohohoohoo !!! the dentist ppl were super nice and i was SO fucking brave abt the needle and didnt freak out at ALL !! have 2 get more stuff done on thursday but im like not even scared at all :3
other than dentist stuff, i got to hang out with sososo many friendsies at the libarby AAAAND MY GIRLYFRIEND YAYAYAYYAYAYAY it was great :3 i was eepy but it was soosoos fun !! i slept great last night too until like 2 AM then cookie woke me up and she puked on my floor ,,, hope shes ok, shes hiding under the couch which is usual